"My goodness, that was beautiful, inspiring and healing." ~ Alicia Mason

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Jan 6
3 min

What are you saying NO to this year?

Before I lay it all out there... I'd like to preface this by saying that I've learned so much this past year about friends, family, my husband, work and mostly, about myself. I've learned more than ever what feels good, and more importantly - what doesn't. 🙅🏻‍♀️ So, what does this emotional "purge" include? Basically anything and everything that no longer serves me. The list I have is pretty decent in my journal, 📝but today I'll provide my top 3 which I know will help remi

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Dec 13, 2021
5 min

No More Mr. Maybe!

Not getting what or who we want sucks, right? Whether it's a raise, a role, a partner, or hitting "that" goal, it hurts and we feel low about it. I know.. I've been there. Earlier today this message popped up in my dms: "Violet, why the hell isn't this working? I've done too much to make this relationship work and now he's pulling back. What am I doing wrong? I'm fed up. Help?" My heart sunk a bit. I felt for her, and before I started drafting some empowering message like I

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Feb 25, 2021
4 min

No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent

I'll say something you may not have heard before. And if you have, I'll say it again: Hurt people... hurt people. You'll never hear something that will make you question your worth from someone who genuinely loves, honors and respects themself. Why? Because people who care and respect themselves, generally care and respect others. They won't make you feel poorly or make you question yourself with the intention to cause pain, frustration, anxiety, sadness or anger. We all ma

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Jan 27, 2021
3 min

Your Pain is Your Purpose

I vividly remember the first time I heard this sentence. I was alone, probably 20 years old sitting as far back in the audience as I could in the Brava Theater Center on 24th Street. I had taken BART home from downtown and it was such a pretty day I decided to get out in the middle of the mission and explore. I can't remember where I was coming from... but I'll never forget where I ended up. As I turned left on 24th Street, I remember the sun hitting my face and all the brigh

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Sep 26, 2020
3 min

See Rejection as Redirection

Rejection burns. Not only does the initial action cause unbearable pain, confusion and misery, but long after the incident is over, it remains like an undesirable scar on skin. Every time you look at it or touch the scar, it brings you back to the physical and emotional state of anger, heartbreak and pain. “Why is he doing this to us?!" A client cried to me in our last coaching call. Her husband and father of her twin, two year olds decided it was time to move to Mexico. He w

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Sep 13, 2020
3 min

If It's Not a Hell Yes, It's a No.

When I was 23, I briefly dated a man and he taught me a lesson I'll never forget. He was a few years older. He was successful. He was tall, kind and attractive. He was inspirational, motivational and he had quotes memorized. He was what I thought "perfect" might be like. He was considerate. He opened the car and restaurant door and before I could pull out my wallet when the check came, he had informed the waiter it was 'already paid" at the front. How is this even real? This

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Jun 25, 2020
4 min

Beyond Depression Lies Love

Clink! I tossed what looked like the most perfect penny, up and over the crowd. Down it went to the bottom of the gorgeous Fontana di Trevi. I'll never forget it. It felt firm in-between my fingers before I tossed it into the unknown, into the universe. "Wait... had I wished for the right thing?" I paused. Of course I had. It's all I ever wanted. Nothing else came close. Before my solo trip to Italy in 2012, I was anything but happy. My college professors, colleagues, family

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Jun 10, 2020
3 min

"No" is a complete sentence.

Ever feel like you're just TOO NICE? Does it cause you anxiety to say NO? I get it and I know. I used to suffer from this too. During all of my 20's I suffered from the need to please. Part of it might've been my upbringing. "Nice girls need to help" and "It's rude to say no" or maybe it's the role I've filled for years as an EA. I guess you can say it's in our DNA to be people pleasers and get it "all done." Or maybe it's just the unspoken words and simple social cues I've

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May 21, 2020
3 min

Pruning Plants... and People

I love coming home and these days... staying home and seeing the color green. It represents life to me and to feel really good, I need to be surrounded with it. My house is full of plants. They're in corners, they're on top of my kitchen cabinets, on my bookshelf, my nightstand, in the bathroom and hanging above our living room window too. --> Friends know I love a great candle, an amazing book or a beautiful plant. I'm definitely that plant lady. What I've learned over the

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