I'll never forget my first panic attack. I was pulling out of my local work parking garage when I felt like the most dreaded sense of overwhelm. It wasn't the normal stress we all feel from working in places we may not enjoy... it was awful. My entire body felt like it was on fire, my chest was pounding and I literally sat in reverse and felt like I couldn't breathe. I put my car in park to not kill anyone on my way out and called the first person on my phone, my friend Tatiana. I knew I wasn't dying but it damn sure felt close.
Immediately I started crying. "What's wrong?!" she asked, but before I could say anything she said, "you have got to get out of that place! It's killing you." And she was right.
Obviously "getting out of the place" that pays your bills and rent isn't always so quick and simple, unless you are a trust-fund baby, which I am definitely not.
As soon as I cried the fear out of me and we hung up, I felt a little better but knew that something had to give. More importantly, I knew it was my choice... to stay and continue to experience awful anxiety and panic episodes... or get the hell out of there and figure out what was happening to me. That moment I said a little prayer... something along the lines of :
"Dear God, what the hell is wrong with me and can you please send me a sign? Literally anything so I know what to do next? Ok thanks."
Those are how my conversations with God usually go: pleading, profanity and down right honest feelings. Just keeping it real.
So, "ask... and you shall receive" is the saying? Well, that's exactly what happened next.
I drove home the exact same way I always did, turned left onto Van Ness Avenue but this time something caught my eye.
"Stop in today for our Transcendental Meditation Training- 5:30pm."
I looked down at the car clock and it was 5:25pm.
"Seriously God? I figured this was as close of a sign as I'd get that day. I was exhausted from work and starving, but I quickly shoved an old granola fruit bar down my throat, pulled out the stuck quarters in my wallet to pay for parking and ran up the building.
"Gosh I hope this isn't some weird cult kinda thing..."
I'm laughing typing this now because well, it was honest thinking. Anything involving meditation for many people can feel weird and "woo-woo".
Looking back now, it's normal to not now how immensely something new can truly benefit you UNTIL YOU TRY IT!
I took the elevator up, quickly scribbled my name on the check-in sheet and sat down. To my surprise, the room was full of everyday people. I sat there quietly and listened to the students which included: a family doctor, a litigation lawyer, a middle school teacher, two construction workers, a single father and even a police officer talk about their personal experience with TM.
I absorbed, tried it out and for the next 3 weeks I went every single day without fail. I was committed and it was because after one evening, it shifted my breathing and thinking and I already felt so much better.
How was this possible? And why didn't I learn about this sooner?
My entire being was transforming and it was all due to Transcendental Meditation.
To put it simply, TM is a simple, effortless technique to "transcend" or go beyond normal meditation and it's been absolutely life-changing.
Since learning how to do this properly, I can say that it's been a game changer. Stress is normal and I know it won't go away forever, but having the tool to manage it, is huge.
Helping people reduce their anxiety, stress and panic attacks has been therapeutic, not only for the clients I work with, but also for me. It's a double-sided benefit and I'm so grateful I learned this method so that I can help others feel better too.
If you're suffering with anxiety, depression, panic attacks or trouble sleeping and want to learn more about TM, I'd love to help you. I offer a single introductory session to TM which you can book by emailing me, but if you're looking for a great community of women to gather with and heal from the inside out, join me for my new offering:
Sign up for my 6 Weeks To Health Journey and you'll learn how to apply and benefit from TM too. Don't wait till it's too late! Doors close Jan 20,2021!
PS: Help is always available... but only if you take action and commit.
Sending you calming vibes this Saturday morning,
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